Boundaries define us. They define what is me and not me. A boundary shows me where I end and someone else begins, leading to a sense of ownership. Knowing what I am to own and take responsibility for gives me freedom. – Henry Cloud
Boundaries are a theme in my life lately. I’m witnessing those who are armored, keeping their hearts so protected against hurt; and then others, myself included, who have allowed ourselves to merge in various degrees with our partners and spouses; we no longer know where we end and they begin…. In either case, whether we need to let our armor down or unmerge, we need to rediscover our sovereignty.
When we honor ourselves by de-armoring or unmerging, we can begin to look closely and understand the essence of who we truly are. When we understand who we are as sovereign beings, we gain clarity about how we need to be in the world; what we need to have in our lives to embody who we are becoming; what we want to feel and experience, and what we need to do to ensure all that being, becoming, embodying and having.
On this deep, inner journey, we learn what we stand for. Sometimes it’s easier at first to know what we stand against, but the for is so much more powerful and transformative. When we know who we are and what we’re for, this defines us and becomes how we define our boundaries. This is where our inner power comes from.
A happy soul is the best shield for a cruel world. – Atticus
In Native American traditions, medicine shields are symbols of that inner power, those defining boundaries. They are “sacred, symbolic objects reflecting the personal vision and ‘medicine’ or spirit-guided inherent powers” (warpathstopeacepipes.com) of those who make and carry them. They hold the sacred intentions and even the soul’s path of the shield carriers.
A medicine shield is “seen” after retrieving a power animal on a vision quest or drum journey because the power animal is your inner power; its qualities and energies are yours to embody; and after interpreting your dreams, when spirit animals often come to visit. The shield is made of leather stretched around a hoop and then painted and decorated with sacred symbols to honor your spirit and power animals. It becomes a mirror of your highest self.
I know it’s time for me to create my medicine shield, for me to be fully in my sovereignty. May it be yours too…. I am so deeply aware of how we all need to set healthy boundaries; and so taken with the idea of creating a living emblem, a medicine shield, of who we are becoming and what we stand for, so we can be in our power and sovereignty, that I’m committed to creating a workshop series just for this. More on that offering soon….
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The soul is shy” shares Parker Palmer in his book, A Hidden Wholeness: The Journey Toward and Undivided Life, and rare are those places where it feels safe and supported and seen.
I took the liberty of updating Sam Keen’s gorgeous prose about the sacred to include the feminine experience. When he wrote that piece many years ago, he believed that men were in desperate need of connection to the sacred. I would say the same is true of women, especially today, so we can regain and reclaim a deeper connection to ourselves.
The sacred wisdom of ceremony and dreams reveal that the sacred is even deeper within us. And we have yet to plumb its full depths. As Robert Johnson, the eminent psychotherapist, wrote in his book, Inner Work: Using Dream and Active Imagination for Personal Growth, “every expression of the unconscious–whether dream, imagination, vision, or ritual–proceeds from the same reservoir deep within. And everything, therefore, works together.”
I was always afraid of the dark. Things going bump in the night (which was usually just my big sister under my bed). Where did that fear of the dark come from? From the uncertainty of it, from not knowing what was behind or within that darkness, or from wanting to avoid the darkness of pain or sadness?
