voice

An expedition to who you truly are, Indiana Jones style

~ nicole
I have found my voice again and the art of using it. – Sidonie Gabrielle Colette

I went on an expedition looking for my soul gifts and along the way I found my voice.

I love when I hear young parents tell their children, “use your words” or “use your voice.” Encouraging them to use their voice is so unlike what those of us of a certain age were expected do; we were to be seen and not heard. Pair that with being told to “not” do so many things, or that what we did wasn’t “correct,” paralyzed not just our voices but our creativity. It raised “good” girls and boys, who possibly rebelled in more covert ways (I know I did), but it did not build women and men who felt they had something of value to say. At least that was my experience….

So, it’s been a lifelong struggle for me to find my voice, use my words and express myself. And now, after much revealing and healing, I can’t stop sharing my story and what I’ve learned because I know it has a purpose now: to guide, support and heal others.

Now, you may be asking yourself, what needed healing and how did I do it? The two are inextricably intertwined.

  1. I had to question the beliefs (assumptions and opinions) I had formed about not just myself but life itself, and discover what was real and true.
  2. I had to let go of expectations and wanting to control the outcome, which opened me to possibility and accepting uncertainty.
  3. I had to acknowledge and face my fear of being shamed, blamed, unapproved of, rejected or disliked.
  4. I had let go of aspects of my identity, and the persona I had created, that weren’t truly me or who I wanted to be.
  5. I had to feel into what I truly cared about and valued, not what my family, friends or society thought I should value.
  6. I had to move from a fear-based, scarcity mindset to one of abundance, which meant embracing gratitude, humility, acceptance, forgiveness, letting go, compassion, and unconditional love.
  7. I had to understand the essence of who I truly am.

From the depths of this inner work–it’s true, you have to do the work, my friends–emerged my true, authentic voice. And much healing, some of which was super subtle requiring just a soft touch.

It was an excavation, almost an anthropological dig, and at the bottom of it was me! I’m not going to say that all that digging and uncovering was easy or not messy; it was, but the result has been absolutely life-changing, life-affirming and life-giving for me.

Know that the excavation is necessary. Know that you don’t have to do all the digging alone. And know that those of us, who have gone on the dig before you, can and will guide you with unconditional love, support and maybe even a bit of wisdom. It’s our mission to do so. Indiana Jones style :).

Your voice is welcome here. So, let me know how this makes you feel.

Copyright ©2017 Soulscape Coaching LLC.

Soul gifts–does the Stork bring them?

~ nicole
At 50, I began to know who I was. It was like I was waking up to myself. – Maya Angelou

So, just where do our soul gifts come from? And are they the same as our purpose or our passion? Both are great questions I’m often asked and well worth exploring.

I believe that we’re born into the world with our soul gifts; so, yes, in a way, the stork brings them :). In the indigenous culture of the Maya, those gifts are divined, acknowledged and honored at birth as the local shaman meets with the parents to determine how best to support their child, so she can live into her gifts and path. What a beautiful gift to give your child: the promise and a plan to nurture his gifts as he grows.

Unfortunately, in the western world, we aren’t given this kind of support at our birth, and so often our gifts are diminished, ignored or unsupported, and we lose our connection to them. Without proper nourishment and care, they simply can’t grow and thrive.

What is fortunate is that we can reclaim those gifts and accelerate their evolution (I know because that’s exactly what I did)…. So, all is not lost, dear soul warrior.

Reclaim your soul gifts

The beauty and richness of knowing our soul gifts is why I start my soul path coaching and courses with Mayan Day Sign readings, the ancient practice that Mayan shamans use in their divination work. These readings guide you through the evolving stages of your life; support you in finding your gifts, purpose and path; and show you what will allow you to achieve those goals and live into your destiny. They are an advanced system for understanding the energies that support and awaken your inner knowledge.

In the west, many believe we are a tabula rasa, a blank slate that we can mold into anything we want to be. Undoubtedly, free will and willpower are extremely powerful. However, we tend to use them a bit blindly: we set our sights on getting or being something and we go for it, but what we achieve doesn’t often acknowledge, nurture or cultivate our soul gifts.

When we forget or ignore those gifts, we feel unfulfilled even when we attain our goal. When we leave our soul bereft; it will cry out in anguish at some point–showing up as anger, frustration, depression, and even addiction or dependency–and we ignore its messages at our peril.

When we wisely use our free will and willpower and choose to fully embody and live into our soul gifts and path, we find our voice and our soul power, and we live a life full of meaning, purpose, and joy.

Share your soul gifts and shine.

So where does that leave purpose and passion? Soul gifts lead you to your purpose. Soul gifts are an energetic life force within you made up of specific characteristics, aspects and energies that are seeking realization. To truly understand your life purpose, you must know your soul gifts first.

We’ve all heard inspirational spokespeople say, “Follow your bliss,” or “Follow your passion,” and while that is a beautiful thing, it will not fully satisfy your soul. Your soul desires more. While passion projects may bring you joy, the joy of your soul gifts is deeper. Its joy connects you to your deepest self, the one that seeks meaning, the one that is your highest potential, the one that wants you to be of service to something much larger than yourself. Passions can be a little bit myopic; sometimes we want to keep them all to ourselves. Soul gifts must be shared.

Once you reclaim and start living into your soul gifts, you share your gifts by just being you, who you truly are, not the construct you’ve been trying to live into. Your self realization is their realization. And when you reach this point, and as you release the energy of your soul gifts into the world, your “work” becomes your joy. It’s an unbelievable feeling.

Feel into what it would mean to reclaim and live into your soul gifts. What would become possible for you?

Follow my Blog or Join my Soul Warrior Tribe and be soulful all the time….

Copyright ©2017 Soulscape Coaching LLC.

Healing your core wound by living into your soul gifts: how brilliant is that?

~ nicole
Other people are going to find healing in your wounds. Your greatest life messages and your most effective ministry will come out of your deepest hurts. – Rick Warren

Can your core wound be a gift? Some teachers in the Finding your True Purpose/Soul’s Path space believe that it’s our inner core wounds, which we experience as a young child, that become our gifts. While I was (and am still) fascinated by this concept and agree with these teachers, and could see how their own wounding became their gift, I couldn’t quite apply the concept to myself. Often we’re the last to know, aren’t we?

You see, I came to understand my soul gifts through reflection from friends and colleagues; by studying my Mayan Day Sign, which is all about soul gifts and path, and understanding the qualities of my birth animal totem from the Native American tradition; and only then did I take the patterns I saw there and look back into my childhood to see if they were reflected. I certainly saw my soul gifts–the gifts I came into the world with–and I was aware of my core wound, but I didn’t quite see how my wound could be a gift, my gift to the world…. It felt like, just a wound.

So here’s how my realization unfolded for me. As I lived more fully into my soul gifts –my ability to deeply listen and hold space for others, reflect back a whole and healing perspective, and guide others to find their own gifts and path­–I began to share my experience and my story with anyone who would listen.

And here’s what’s fascinating: my core wound was all about not having a voice, about not feeling worthy enough on an unconscious level to share my thoughts and beliefs and even feelings. My voice (and me by association) did not matter.

When I began walking my soul’s path, I discovered that I finally had something to say, something of value to share, something that just had to be said, so I couldn’t stop talking or writing about it. For the first time in my life, I didn’t care if people glanced at me sideways or thought I was crazy or were just humoring me. I knew that what I had learned and experienced was real and true and beautiful, and that I had no choice, but to share.

It was in the sharing that I was healing myself. It was in the sharing that I found purpose and meaning. It was in the sharing that I found joy. It was in the sharing that I was guiding others to their own healing.

Finding my voice was a bright, new shiny gift. How brilliant is that?

So, the questions I find myself asking are: “What do I do with my voice, beyond what I’m already doing?” “How do I amplify my voice for its highest and best use?” “How do I help others find their voice, so they may have more purpose, meaning and joy in their lives?” “How can this gift keep on giving?” Because you know it’s going to be contagious, but in a good way….

How can our gifts keep on giving?

I’m still here in this new territory of voice, feeling my way through it, but it gives me no end of joy to contemplate it. I have opened the door to possibility. And now I have shared it with you.

May my sharing somehow inspire you to find and truly value your own voice, or find your own core wound, which may not be your voice but another, and heal it, so it becomes your bright gift to the world.

Please share your thoughts with me. I’d be honored to hear from you. And that way, I will have the privilege of responding with my voice to you. I need all the practice I can get :).

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Happy Valentine’s to the Eagle & the Condor, may they be one again

~ Nicole Gnutzman
I honor myself…As the divine feminine blends with the masculine. I now come into balance. – Trudy Vesotsky
When the sacred masculine is combined with the sacred feminine inside each of us, we create the “sacred marriage”of compassion and passion in ourselves. –Matthew Fox

img_2816This past Saturday, I held cacao ceremony for a women’s group and their partners in a gorgeous yurt nestled in the redwoods. To honor their coming together as couples in ceremony, which is a rare and beautiful thing, I created a theme that called on western astrology, Mayan cosmology and Amazon prophecy to reflect the energy of the divine feminine and masculine. I knew it would be a wild ride full of potentiality, which in itself is such a luscious word full of rich, nuanced meaning, that I simply had to share the experience here with you.

This past New Moon on January 28th was in Aquarius, an Air sign, that is independent, innovative, rebellious, evolutionary and brings the winds of change and inspiration. It is full of spirit energy, symbolizing “the eternal giving of life and spiritual food of the world.” * Aquarius brings the gift of expanded consciousness, a paradigm shift towards “love, inclusion and integrity”* while balancing intellect and insight, intuitive energy and integrated, transformative power. It is a powerhouse of the most inspired qualities of the divine masculine and the divine feminine.

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Right now we are all being called to awaken together to use our voices and power to defend and protect our rights, the planet and all people–we are rising into our truth. This is our vision and our inspiration, and one we need to embrace together to attain.

From the stars and planets of western astrology, we reached across time to Mayan cosmology and the day sign of February 4th, 2017: Kame, which means death, the cycle of life, and transformation. It is a time of profound change, soul level choice and higher expression. It asks us to face and release our fears, so we can relax into our soul’s true purpose and potential. The number 2, associated with this day, signifies duality and choice, relationship and self-sacrifice; it is the number of lovers, of course.

img_3720From the Mayan world, we entered the Amazon rainforests to honor the prophecy of the Eagle and the Condor, which foretold that human societies would split into two paths: one of the Eagle, which symbolizes the path of the mind, the material and the masculine; and the other, the Condor, which is the path of the heart, intuition and the feminine. The prophecy also foretells that the potential exists within all of us for the Eagle and the Condor to come together and fly in the same sky when we create a new level of consciousness and live in balance with nature and within ourselves. It is up to us to activate the potential.***

Each of these reflections of energy–from the prophecy of the Amazon to Mayan cosmology to western astrology–show us the path of where we are being asked to go, towards a higher expression of ourselves, the balancing and integration of masculine and feminine energies.

As the supine couples emerged from their cacao journey, each was transformed. The men in circle expressed their gratitude for the powerful feminine energy they felt in the room, and within themselves, while they had tears streaming down their faces. The glowing women shared how fearless they felt connecting to their divine masculine. Their tears and their joy at being reconnected with themselves, their partners and life itself was testament to what’s possible when we live into our fully conscious potential. It was truly divine.

I echo what one of the women of light shared as we closed the beautiful and powerful ceremony by wishing you a “Happy Valentine’s Day.” May it be a day of the divine expression of the power of love and reconnection.

moon-sun-art

 

Copyright © 2017 by Soulscape Coaching LLC.
*from Aquarian Styles: http://aquarianstyles.tumblr.com/post/100854962887/the-water-bearer-symbolizes-an-eternal-giving-of
**from Mystic Mamma: http://www.mysticmamma.com/new-moon-in-aquarius-january-27-28th-2017/
***from Pachamama.org: https://www.pachamama.org/blog/the-eagle-and-the-condor-prophecy

Fiercely compassionate, warrior heart

~ Nicole Gnutzman
A warrior’s strength is measured by the size of her heart. She shows love, honor and respect. She will stand and fight in the face of adversity for the ones she loves. She will be their voice. She will be their shield. She leads by example. Always remembering who she is.~ Hiwoxuuniis – Two Elk

I’ve been avoiding writing my blog since the election. What could I possibly write about that wouldn’t seem trite or ignore and diminish the impact that the election had on all of us? How can I express my fierce compassion? When I mentioned my dilemma to a friend, she said wisely, “well, then that’s exactly what you should write about.”

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People everywhere, not just in the US, are taking the results of the US election very seriously. My friends in Canada, on the morning after the election, asked on Facebook, “What do I tell my children now that the bully won? The bully isn’t supposed to win.” Such touching words on behalf of our little ones, who have been taught that bullying isn’t okay, and that we have to speak up to protect ourselves.

My 14-year-old stepson and his friends decided to speak up and make their voices heard when they and their entire high school marched in protest in San Francisco after Trump’s win. Others needed time to grieve before deciding what to go do and make their voices heard. But don’t ever assume, like some Trump supporters have, that the children of this world won’t take action or are soft because they needed time to grieve. They know exactly what matters and what they stand for. They are an example to us all.

 

I am also heartened by the women and men (3.7M strong and growing) that I see on a private Facebook group of which I am proud to be a part. Every day, they share stories of how their children are voicing their support for equality, how they themselves have stood up for someone in need to ensure they are safe, how they are writing and calling their congress representatives, how they are donating to Planned Parenthood and the ACLU, and more. Every day, they share how the stories are giving them the strength to stand up for what they believe in and speak without fear. Every day, I am emboldened by these stories.

Some may say that it’s about time we woke up and spoke up, and they would be right. Others would say it’s not enough, but it’s a start and there is huge momentum behind this. And still others would try to dismiss it by saying, “just get over it.” Sorry, folks that’s an old story line. We don’t tell our children that anymore because it robs them of their voice.

We’re not going to be get over it; we’re not going to be silent; and we aren’t going to go away. This is a movement and it is going to build and strengthen. We compassionate folk are fierce. We chose love over hate and will keep on choosing it over and over again.

You see, we are for something now, not against. We are for the rights of minorities, immigrants, indigenous peoples, women, the LGBT community, disabled peoples, and veterans. We are sharing our compassion and love with impact. We are ensuring that our children can grow up in a world that respects their choices and their voices. We are fierce and compassionate.

And I choose those words–fierce and compassionate–carefully and deliberately. Do not underestimate those who walk with fierce compassion. We are motivated and moved into action by our compassion and by our “insight into mutual belonging” (Joanna Macy). We are warriors of the heart.

Copyright ©2016 Soulscape Coaching LLC